nature in action
mindi caught these fabulous pictures of the food chain in action - a raptor of some sort devours a small mammal of some sort.
we all end up as poop in the end.
you can buy anything in chinatown.
saw this wonderfully well-written ad for a product i’m not sure i’d really want to buy.
fire kelvin sampson? why ever hire kelvin sampson?
finally the iu athletic department has apparently come to its senses and relieved kelvin sampson of the job he never should have had. of course, not before paying him $750,000 (well, actually only $200k from their own pocket). wait — there’s no sense in that whatsoever. he committed the same terminable offenses he’d committed during his time at Oklahoma where he also got that school’s program in trouble with the NCAA. getting rid of him is not enough - the folks responsible for that ridiculous decision need to go too. whether that means getting rid of AD Rick Greenspan or somehow sending a goon squad after former University prez Adam Herbert, i’m unsure. Herbert definitely seems to hold the majority of the culpability as indicated in this espn.com article:
Remember what then-IU president Adam Herbert said during the introductory news conference nearly two years ago?
“I am fully convinced that he will elevate the program to what you expect,” Herbert said. “You will love his values …”
(I’m sorry. I have to stop for a moment. You can only laugh so hard.)
And later: “He has made clear … that he will comply fully with NCAA regulations.”
Sure he will. Two months after that ‘06 news conference, the NCAA penalized Sampson for “deliberate non-compliance.”
or in this one:
Indiana University president Adam Herbert addressed the allegations when he introduced Sampson last month, and Stephen Ferguson, the president of the university’s trustees, acknowledged it was something top officials sought to clarify during the interview process.
“That was obviously our No. 1 concern,” Ferguson said last month. “We spoke with the attorney and Oklahoma extensively. We reviewed the situation and we were satisfied.”
satisfied how? you guys are idiots. there’s really nothing more to say, especially since when you’re talking about Oklahoma, you’re referring to the school with a “lack of institutional control,” or as Oklahoma plead to the NCAA for leniency, a “failure in monitoring”. in both cases, i think that means asleep at the wheel, and not really the best people to bounce shit off.
“study says many studies suck”
i had to share this article which i found on sfgate.com. it’s not so much that i think it’s a well-written piece of journalism. actually, i kinda wanted to comment on it because i think it includes a sentence that is longer than any run-on i’ve ever been criticized for writing:
Sure, couples who can discuss their issues and share emotions and who actually respect their mates, yes, they might live longer because, well, they’re healthier overall than the numb thick dolts who repress their rage and beat the dog and then get sick all the time and suffer depression and alcoholism because they’re shut down miserable meatwads and oh by the way THIS ALL HAS ABSOLUTELY ZERO TO DO WITH COUPLEHOOD OR FIGHTING and everything to do with whether or not you’re a tolerable and decent and somewhat emotionally open person regardless of marital status or whether you scream at your husband about the dishes, and therefore “Spouses Who Fight Live Longer” is complete misleading crap and it should be “Emotionally Functional Humans Are Better Off Than Repressed Stunted Time Bombs Gosh What A Shock But We Had To Make Something Up To Get Our Goddamn Funding.”
wow! at least it uses six commas. i think this exonerates me from being the worst run-on offender ever though. thanks, Mark Morford - i applaud your disdain of the period and the use of run-on for emphasis. i’m very emphatic sometimes myself.
but seriously, despite my literary criticisms (which barely have their own legs to stand on) the guy raises a good point. everything’s being boiled down into asinine studies which often turn directly into the ammo that our “leaders” and those pressing for particular kinds of change use to sway public opinion. of course i don’t think that’s always a bad thing — this country desperately needs some change. but statistics can easily be manipulated or so pathetically and unscientifically derived that the resulting “facts” can easily be misused or taken out of their proper context, or just amount to plain old bullshit.
so the next time you see some “factoid”, don’t be so quick to believe it without knowing and considering the source. the study telling you you’ll reduce your chances of salmonella by using brand x counter wipes is probably funded by the multinational conglomeration that owns brand x, or some other seemingly unrelated think tank they own too. the study disputing global warming might be funded by the oil company who stands to lose billions in oil sales to ethanol. and the study that says using ethanol instead of oil will help slow or reverse global warming might be funded by one of the few agribusiness giants that dominate our food economy and who’ve changed our food system for the worse by homogenizing and commoditizing corn, so much so that it makes economic sense to force feed it to ruminants who can’t normally survive on it, still have all this leftover corn to sell which would make great ethanol, but fail to mention the amount of energy that has to go into growing all that corn to begin with, and the how the destructive farming practices required to grown so much homogenous corn so densely results in significant ecological and environmental damage in its own right, and how all those corn-fed cows and the antibiotics and crap they also have to ingest to survive on a non-natural-to-them diet in such closed quarters, and how all that’s passed up the food chain to the consequently ever-fatter and prone-to-significant-illness american eater.
these are all things i just made up, i don’t actual have links to such studies, though you can read a lot more about the subject of commodity corn and the resulting impact in The Omnivore’s Dilemma: A Natural History of Four Meals by Michael Pollan (though you should totally question the author and his sources here still too). i’m just speaking in hypotheticals, though i bet if you searched the web you could find something that matched each example i’ve made up here. the point, simply, is “yes! question what you read and where and who it comes from.”
and by the way…i think i did beat Mark’s run-on. bring it bitch!
new quote of the day
this one comes to us from tim gunn of bravo’s project runway:
this is the skirt? it looks like a coffee filter, or a maxi-pad.
sadly, he was spot on. and sadly, i just revealed that i watch this show.
finally, a decent ween album!
i should probably start by disarming that title a little, as i really don’t think that ween, possibly one of the greatest bands of all time, has failed to put out a good album since “The Mollusk”. i will admit that i liked several songs on “White Pepper” (namely “The Grobe” and “Pandy Fackler”) and that “Quebec” wasn’t completely terrible either. “Zoloft” and “The Argus” give me enough to justify the cost of the album. i wasn’t impressed with “Shinola, Vol. 1″ much at all, though I do enjoy listening to “Boys Club” every once in a while for the Michael McDonald-esque vocals they go for on this track. still, nothing says Ween to me like “Chocolate and Cheese” and “The Pod” — nearly every track is a winner.
so for christmas this year, my mom got me “La Cucaracha” — and it’s brilliant. we return to the motif of nearly a different style for every track, and some of them are home runs. others don’t quite make it, but have enough redeeming qualities to make it a complete success as an (in)cohesively seminal Ween album in my book.
big hitters have to be “Blue Balloon” (floaty weirdo electronic pop), “Object” (dark and demeaning tale of what might well be a serial murderer), “Learnin’ to Love” (a hoe down with a catchy little “do do deliddledodeliddledodeliddledo” refrain), “With My Own Bare Hands” (typical dirty Ween cock rock), “Sweetheart” (Gordon Lightfoot returns!), and “Your Party” (something like adult contemporary meets food criticism).
dig it. it’s really good.
i am the champion, my friend.
in my last post, i had mentioned my surprising success in my fantasy football league, this being the first year i’ve ever played. well, i managed to win the playoffs and collect on a small wager in the process. the final score was:
White Lightning 74
sissyboys 89
go sissyboys! (that’s me, btw.) i ended up finishing 12-2-0 with 1190 points scored in regular season play, then 2-0 in the playoffs with another 176 points in those 2 games. not bad! in terms of my roster, here’s how much each player contributed to the bottom line:
Ben Roethlisberger (QB) 312
Gus Frerotte (QB) -4
Marvin Harrison (WR) 16
Larry Fitzgerald (WR) 96
Hines Ward (WR) 74
Wes Welker (WR) 63 [+31 more i missed while he rode the bench]
Nate Washington (WR) 2 [+22 bench]
Adrian Peterson (RB) 205
Brandon Jacobs (RB) 71 [+43 bench]
Ryan Grant (RB) 92
Lamont Jordan (RB) 42 [+28 bench]
Heath Evans (RB) 6 [+6 bench]
Dallas Clark (TE) 92
Donald Lee (TE) 3 [+45 bench]
Mason Crosby (K) 66 [ +75 bench]
Nick Folk (K) 68 [+45 bench]
San Diego (DEF) 91 [+96 bench]
Indianapolis (DEF) 60 [+84 bench]
not a bad team, though i really misplayed the defense. the kickers were more of a game of keep away, as i held onto them both mainly to have a shoe-in and keep points off other rosters. eh, strategy! see! i’m not a total doofus.
obligatory bimonthly blog post!
well, it’s been nearly two months since i managed to actually write anything here. i guess having a job and a real life precludes me from updating you huddling masses gathered round the warmth of your collective monitors with the words of truth that shall set you free. you might wonder what i’ve been up to during this long hiatus. well, let’s see…i’ve:
- spent ten days in argentina
- gotten a haircut
- upgraded my mac to leopard
- been a groomsman in my brother-in-law’s wedding in beautiful fort wayne, in
- downloaded the new radiohead album, which is quite good i might add
- finally upgraded to comcast hd digital cable after ten months of putting it off
- had my fantasy football team go 12-2 for the regular season, giving me the #1 seed in the playoffs — wish me luck!
- got an old filling replaced
there, i think that’s quite enough about me. what have YOU been up to? this focus on me all the time kinda makes me really uncomfortable.
best quote of the day
this comes courtesy of judge judy scheindlin (i think i got this down correctly):
there is nothing more unattractive than a woman who drinks and can’t control her mouth.
dude, that’s harsh.
jim harbaugh is the man. period.
oh sweet wolverine bringer of dreams, you gave me such joys as the 1994-1995 indianapolis colts season, when you led the league with a 100.7 rating (first colt since ‘65 to do so) and gave us our first post-season win since 1971. despite the colts loss to the steelers in the 1995 afc championship, i still revered you as mangod when i served you at pizza express, where i spent years making big ten bargains and breadsticks all damn night long, and did not spit on your food. (for the record, no one ever spits on a pizza at that fine establishment.) you gave me such joy and i was sad to see you leave, but hey, we got peyton fucking manning now, dude. you were cool and all, but seriously.
anyhow, now i see that you have led 41-point underdog
stanford to an upset of those cocksuckers from usc, 24-23. you are too good to me, jim harbaugh. it troubles me greatly that we are both in palo alto now, for i would probably have to give you a very big hug right if i saw you. plus it kind seems like you’re stalking me, coming here from indiana after me. creepy.
but still, you’re awesome.
